I’m Carrie, writing to give some advice on how transition from online discussions to real dates when using hookup sites. This is a blockage that any seasoned online dater has faced. Once you have been chatting enough with someone and you know you want to meet up, how do you go about asking her out without sounding desperate, without, asking too quickly, or without seeming too cool to care.
I’ve got some ideas to help in this area, which I’ve picked up over the years. There is nothing more frustrating than wanting to meet up with someone but being unable to make it happen, for whatever reason. I’m going to address some of these reasons, and provide solutions so you can get over the hump and start having some real fun dating sites online. It’s all about using convincing language that make you come across as interested, but not desperate, for online singles. I’ve found it always helps to suggest an interesting thing to do in the afternoons, like apple picking or the arcade. Having something to do takes the pressure away from awkward silences, but it’s all about that convincing language in the first place. Of course it’s all about the language that you use on the hookup sites, so make sure to keep it simple, and don’t make any promises you can’t keep.
Hookup Sites: Get Right To The Point
The first and most obvious technique is to be straightforward, and make it count with online singles. Tell her that you think she is funny and intelligent, and probably 100 times more beautiful in person. Being bullish like this is easier on the internet than in person, and it’s pretty likely that she will say “Yes” to a date if you have been chatting for a while already. I do not recommend getting right to the point within the first five minutes of chatting, though. Being direct works best once you have opened up about yourself enough to get her to trust you. These things are all about trust, so be prepared to be open. Since you are probably looking for one night stands, I can say with confidence that you will not have any trouble finding hookups if you look on the right sites that are great for one night stands.
Go For Casual Sex
In your online discussions, it is likely that some of her hobbies have come up, or something to do with her interests outside of work have been discussed. That’s going to make it more likely that you will have casual sex with her, because she would be doing those things anyways. Think about those, and propose to take her out to experience something related to her hobbies. Let’s say she likes to watch Football on the weekends. Well, consider when a good game is coming up, and suggest meeting up to watch it together at her favorite local bar, or even at your place. She might say no, but she might take you up on the offer in the near future.
Make It Count
The more you make her laugh in your online discussions, the more curious you will seem to her. Coming across detached and lonely on the forum will turn her right off. You want to make it count, so the best thing is to be self-deprecating. Poke fun at yourself – she’ll like that because it makes you seem penetrable, just a normal human with emotions and flaws like everyone else. This is also a good opportunity to mention some of your favorite comedians. If she shares some of the same faves, then consider offering to take her out to a stand up comedy show. Going to a public event of this nature is better than a movie or a music or theatre event. Why? Because they are shorter, and you can have little banter while it’s going on without pissing anyone off.
I’ve always found this to be the best way to break the ice. Meet up for a coffee in the afternoon, or at lunch. That way you can just get a feel for her energy, and you don’t need to get into anything in-depth right away. It’s all about forging that initial face-to-face contact, and often women are unwilling to go on a date just for the hell of it. THere is so much expectation attached to conventional dating that makes many women scared of what it implies. So keep it simple, but always be cheeky. One trick that always works for me is to tell your online fling that randomly you’ll be near her office next week, and that it would be nice to meet up for a quick coffee. She probably won’t say no to that because there is no expectation attached.
On the other hand, it may come up in conversation that she is in need of help in some area, whether it be home fix-up or something else. Extending a helping hand will instantly put you in her good books. She is exposing herself by mentioning this, and the least you can do is offer some assistance.